Day 5

I can’t believe that this is the final day. I was naturally awake this morning at five o’clock, perhaps because I was too excited and nervous last night. Since I got up so early, I recited the script of the presentation the last few times. The whole forenoon we were doing presentations, as well as listening to other groups’ presentations. The presentation went smoothly, thanks to my full preparation, and the teacher praised all the details I had thought of. For instance, I talked about why I chose to replace the regular ball with the wool ball in the warm-up game, how I thought about color psychology while designing the guide paper, and many other details such as the tone in the introduction part and the font we use. The teacher said he really appreciated my consideration and I was the first student to talk about the progress of our ideas with so specific explanation. The presentations of the other groups were pretty well as well, and they also inspired me a lot.

After taking a simple lunch, we arrived at the elderly service center again and began to prepare the site of our workshop. The participants that our group was allocated with were all really active, and they even chat with as enthusiastically with us before the start of the workshop.

Thanks to the adjustment I made the day before, the practice of the warm-up game today was perfect. Being able to play with the wool ball freely, the participants became far more active, voluntary, and out-going than at the initial start of the workshop.

Even though the majority of the parts of the workshop went smoothly and even exceeded our expectations, there happened some small accidents. While most of the participants of the workshop were cooperative and active since they joined this activity voluntarily, a grandma was led by his husband and refused to respond to any of our instructions or play any games. I told funny stories and played simpler games with her personally, willing to help her enjoy the workshop. However, after several hard tries, I still got nothing besides a cold face with undisguised disgust in her eyes, and the repetition of “I want to go home. Live me alone.” Though understanding the potential of losing confidence during the workshop previously, I could not help feeling frustrated. Meanwhile, I felt gibes and critiques haunting me, causing cracks in the walls protecting my self-esteem, making the flexibility that I have always refused to admit becoming increasingly difficult to hide.

While my brain was constantly saying “Leave her alone then. Stop wasting time and embarrassing yourself”, my heart firmly refused to ignore any of my “customers”. At this difficult moment, I got a glimpse of her handkerchief with traditional flower patterns and finally came up with an idea. I paused the beautiful classical music the speaker was playing and chose a traditional, festive Chinese music. As the familiar tune emerged, a sparkle of light appeared in her eyes all of a sudden. The grandma and all the other participants shook their heads and clapped their hands with the rhythm——some of them even stood up to dance. Within a minute, I whispered to my groupmates about the change of the workshop and used more elements that are special and familiar to the elderly people in the rest of the project. And after this little change, the grandma finally relaxed and joined the rest of the workshop far more actively.

When the workshop finally came to an end, she came to me and handed me a candy with a warm smile. My groupmates and I smiled at each other too. They said that I solved a difficult problem, while I know that, the grandma was never a “problem”. She was merely afraid of all the strangers and all the novel things that she could not understand. And all she needed was something familiar, something harmonious, something that could bring her back to the happiest moments in her life.

During this experience, I obviously felt myself being far more extroverted and open-minded than before, even my expressing ability and improvising ability were highly improved. Facing those cute elderly people and placing myself into the role of a “therapist”, I spontaneously raised my volume and used a kind of “kindergarten-teacher-like” tone to lead them into the activity, with a huge, sweet smile. My groupmates were really surprised at my leadership and all the humorous language I used to relieve the embarrassment. I had never thought about the timid me being able to show such confidence and enthusiasm in work intimately related to socialization. For I moment, I felt like I was born for social service (just kidding, I’m born for Psychology hhh)——I enjoy the process of doing such things so much, and my characteristics and altitudes just fit this kind of work.

Another moving point for me in the practice today was that “therapy” is actually a mutual process. In the process of the workshop, I constantly received whole-hearted compliments and affirmation: At the beginning of the workshop when we were chatting together, they praised my personality and said that they loved my smile; When I was teaching them to complete simple craftwork, they repeated “You’re so smart! Did you make all of these things? That’s awesome!”; And in the last part, the collective artwork, though I merely drew a simple leave on the canvas, a grandpa came to me with glittering appreciation in his eyes and praised: “This is magnificent. You must have studied art, haven’t you? I knew that. People who study art always have so many creative ideas in their mind…” I especially remembered a grandpa drawing a thumb-up pattern on his guide paper. When I asked him his inspiration, he told me: “I love complimenting others, and love being complimented as well. You will receive compliments as long as you compliment others frequently. Compliments energize people, and this is a really positive cycle.” I felt it philosophic when I first heard this sentence but didn’t know that it would be proved so fast in the rest of the workshop anyway. It was the compliments that have always been refreshing me and energizing me in the whole two-hour workshop, that prevented me from feeling too exhausted or tired when constantly running around and speaking at the top of my voice. After the completion of the workshop, I felt like the person who was just healed, who was just cured, who was just given a “therapy”, was no one but myself.

When the workshop finished, I overheard one of the participants sharing this special experience with her friend on the phone. She said: “This activity is great. I just love being with these little kids. They are so cute and full of energy.” I felt my heart stopped for a second when I heard this. Actually, I have a similar feeling——I love getting along with children younger than me, they are just so cute and naïve that I always feel like I’m watching the younger myself. Maybe for the elderly people, being with us is like seeing the “younger themselves” as well. Maybe for them, all these games derived from our effort and creativity are not so important——what they really need is accompaniment, someone to talk with and do interesting things with. Maybe the most direct “therapy” is not about visual-art therapy, or music therapy, or dance therapy——but about accompaniment, about sunshine, about love.

Looking back on the past week, what I have gained is knowledge, a further determination of the direction of my future development, a further exploration of myself, and a brimming sense of warmth and love. A few days’ effort may be too weak to change anything in society, but someone must be the one to start doing this. In the marathon of love relay, the mere start is already an initial triumph. Only dribs and drabs of help could gather into a powerful torrent, to wash out all the bias and malice, to irrigate a barren piece of land, to wash a mind whose light was hidden by the dirt from the outside world.